Tips on Goal Setting for People with Bipolar Disorder

I read somewhere that we often overestimate what we can accomplish in one day, but underestimate what we can accomplish in a year. With that thought in mind, I started setting monthly goals for myself.

I used to set daily goals, but my lists were always too long. The goals looked achievable, but I just couldn't get them all done in a day. Sometimes I'd try to push myself to do every one of them on the list, but I'd often end up in bad mood... frustrated, anxious, disappointed in myself, etc.

Setting and achieving goals can be difficult, and Bipolar Disorder adds a few twists to the process. The unpredictability of the disorder makes it hard to judge how many normal days you'll have. Furthermore, while the many ideas we have during hypomania or mania can be productive, there can also be some ideas that throw us off course. The trick is to figure out what's important to do, and what's distraction.

Benefits of Monthly Goal Setting

- Completion of Projects. I come up with a lot of ideas, especially when I'm feeling "up." Monthly goal setting means that ideas for new projects have to be put off until the next month, or until the current month's goals have been completed. This encourages completion of current projects before starting new things, which means less unfinished projects. It also means time to think before jumping into a new project. This time for thinking can be used to make better decisions.

- Looking at the big picture. One day is a very small time. The success of a long term project or goal shouldn't be judged on one day. When choosing monthly goals, I reflect on the whole previous month, rather than just one day. Everyone has bad days, and it's best not to put too much weight on them.

How to Set Achievable Monthly Goals

- Set goals that you have complete control over. If you're unemployed, the goal "get a job" isn't a good one. However, a goal of sending out a certain number of resumes, practicing interview techniques, etc, is something you have control over. Likewise, if you're in sales, you can't guarantee a certain dollar amount in sales, but you can write down specific actions that you can take that will make it likely that you will increase your sales.

- Break a big project into small parts. Your goals should be to achieve these small parts of a project. If you're writing a book, a goal could be “Write Chapter 1.”

- Strive for consistency. Look at what you achieved the previous month, and make goals that are equal to or a little big greater. Consistency is a hard thing to achieve, and a goal that keeps your output consistent is a goal that will give you great long term rewards. People often give up too early.

- It is better to underestimate what you can achieve than to overestimate. If you get your monthly goals done early, then you can start on new goals early. Next time you will have a better idea of what can be achieved.

- No task is too small to be a goal. You can set goals for activities that will likely turn into a habit. Your goal could be to brush your teeth two times a day, every day. If you do this all month long, it's unlikely that you will stop doing this once the month ends. You will have developed a habit.

Depression and Monthly Goals

Depression can make you want to give up. It can also make negative events stand out in your mind, and you may have trouble remembering the positive things. When you think about “what point is there to all of this” it's hard to have the willpower to complete a goal.

If you write your goals when you are feeling hopeful, positive, and optimistic, then when you are depressed, you can remember that these goals were written by the positive you, and you can try to talk yourself into working on the goals because that happy you will come back, and you don't want to let her (or him) down.

Sometimes depression makes it hard to do anything, and if that's the case, you can relax and know that you truly do have the whole month to accomplish the goals, so taking off a day won't ruin everything. Sometimes the depression has to be treated first, and you should take steps to treat it. Treating the depression can be a goal in of itself. The goal should be specific though, like: Talk to doctor, find therapist, read a book on depression, etc.

Dieting?

Dieting is a common goal for the New Year, but unfortunately, I think trying to make radical changes to your diet can make your moods more chaotic. Speaking for myself, when I try to eat much less food, I tend to get more anxious, have trouble sleeping, etc.

It's easier for me to replace a healthful food with an unhealthful food, than it is for me to focus on just eating less.

Having high expectations might just be setting yourself up for disappointment when you feel that you have 'failed' your diet plan.

What has worked for me -

1. Eat oatmeal some days instead of a bagel.

2. Sometimes, drink water or unsweetened tea instead of juice or milk.

3. Eat an apple or some other fruit/vegetable snack with my lunch.

What hasn't worked for me:

1. Decide not to eat before bedtime.  This advice is widely given, but I often have trouble falling asleep if I don't eat something before bedtime.  Or, I fall asleep but then wake up in the middle of the night or the early morning just starving (and grumpy).  So I feel better if I eat when my body tells me to eat, which often means a bedtime snack.

2. Decide to completely eliminate all 'bad' food from the house. Although this sounds like a good idea because we eat what we have around the house, it has one major flaw.... If we don't see anything tasty at home we may decide to grab some fast food! See, I don't live in an isolated world where all I have is my home kitchen.  I have fast food places all around me.  So although I do try to buy fewer 'bad' foods at the store, eliminating my favorite snacks altogether is just going to make it likely that I will want to get some food out.... which is probably worse than just not eating a perfect diet at home.

Above picture Creative Commons licensed and is from Flickr:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/di4b0liko/2260545180/

New Year's Resolutions for People with Bipolar Disorder

Making goals is different if you're Bipolar. You can't expect to be able to accomplish the same amount when you are down as compared to when you are normal or manic.  It's just not a reality.

If you are manic or hypomanic, you may make a goal that you can not complete once your mood changes.  If you can look at what you've accomplished in the last year, and then just aim to do a bit better, you have a greater chance of succeeding.  Remember, you want a goal that you have a very good chance of accomplishing!

Julie Fast says that her goal for the year is stability, and I think it is also my New Year's resoltuon.  Sure, I have a long list of other goals, but as she says, "When we (and the people we love) are stable, anything is possible." 

Aside from that, I have one other resolution which I think is very possible: A walking goal.  I feel better when I walk, and over the past year, I have been able to walk either 1/2 mile or 1 mile on most days. However, there were weeks when I really slacked, either because I didn't feel well, or because the weather was just terrible, so when figuring out my New Year's resolution, I try to calculate in the percentage of days where I just won't be walking, so that I can come up with a goal that I think is actually realistc. 

Remember a goal should be motivating, but not daunting!  

An alternative to having a New Year's resolution is having a series of monthly goals. Focus on accomplishing one task for January, and then in February focus on a different goal. These can be cumulative, or progressive. Whatever works for you.  Setting montly goals also allows you to re-evaluate your plans every month, so you can see if you are still on the right track.  It also gives you a dozen chances to "do better."

Happy New Year to you!  

Surfing photo above is credited to http://www.flickr.com/photos/mikebaird/3072645479/ 

Licensed by Creative Commons via Flickr.